Yeah, bitches! #christmascake
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Vodka Christmas Cake
Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my Vodka Christmas Cake recipe so here goes:
1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1 bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit.
Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality.
Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
At this point, it is best to make sure the Vodka is still OK. Try another cup just in case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the fruit up off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count it. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Vodka to test for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something. Check the Vodka. Now shit shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window.
Finish the Vodka and wipe the counter, put your feet up with a refreshing beer.
WWMBS? (What Would Mary Berry Say?)
“Well, at least it TASTES lovely”.
(Source: iwantchickennugget, via annainaus)
Birthday carrot cake
It’s my housemate’s birthday today! He requested a carrot cake so I relished the opportunity to make one that hopefully works this time. I love the fact that we’re both ginger and share the same favourite cake. How stereotypical of us.
It was so simple to make, here’s the recipe!
(Argh I don’t know why the ‘read more’ break won’t work, sorry)
225g self-raising flour
1 1/2 tsps cinnamon, 1/2 tsp ginger, 1/2 tsp mixed spice, 1/4 tsp nutmeg
1 tsp baking powder
225g light brown soft sugar
100g walnuts
1/2 rind of a large orange
150ml sunflower oil
3 free range eggs
250g grated carrots
Preheat oven to 180C and grease and line 2 x 20-ish cm round tins. Sift the flour, baking powder and spices into a bowl. Add the sugar, orange and walnuts and mix around. Add the oil, eggs, and carrots and mix with a wooden spoon till thoroughly combined. Divide between the tins and bake for 20-25 minutes.
Leave on a wire rack to cool and make the ICING, mmmm icing…
200g full fat cream cheese, 50g butter, 150g icing sugar, rind of 1/2 orange and 2 tsp orange juice. Beat together until smooth, either by hand or with a mixer. When the cakes are completely cool, spread half the icing on one cake and sandwich the other on top, spreading the remaining icing on the top. Decorate with walnuts or oranges if you’re feeling fancy!
Taken from the excellent Great British Book of Baking.
(Source: connierose04)
Lemon polenta cake.
I whipped this up this morning because I had a lemon knocking about in the cupboard and thought it looked a bit sad. So behold, a beautiful summer’s day cake! And so simple.
Ingredients:
120g SR flour
180g granulated sugar
140g polenta
80ml sunflower oil
80ml milk
Juice and grated rind of one lemon
1 egg
Preheat the oven to 180C, bung all the ingredients into a bowl and give it a good old mix around, pour it into a lined loaf tin and bake for 50 minutes. Ice with a drizzle of icing sugar and lemon juice glacé icing. Delicious!
Made this for the second time in a month today. So simple, so delicious!
